Life Lessons in Ballroom Dancing?

I've started ballroom dancing in the last few months (something I've always wanted to do), and if you put a bit of work into it (aka, a lot of exercise), it's fantastic!  Two people, uniting and working together perfectly (at least theoretically) in dance and movement, is one of the most powerful and meaningful, physical and mental experiences I've ever had in my limited years of life experience.  The way the two work together is also mind-blowing for me.
Everyone, I think, has heard of the terms "lead" and "follow" in ballroom (mainly in social/unrehearsed) dancing.  I had heard that too, but because of my growing independent streak, I found it extremely difficult to be the "follower" instead of the "lead."  I tried to follow anyway, but it still wasn't quite working (I am, of course, still a beginner).  Sometimes I was fed up with following because it wasn't working for me, so I unconsciously (sometimes consciously) started leading (or anticipating the other person's moves).  But that didn't work either!  When both people are leading, there is no common goal, because we obviously cannot read each others minds, and therefore the two cannot work together.  Ergo, there must be only one leader, and the other must be the follower.
The man has probably been designated the "lead" because of the patriarchal societies in history that the ballroom dances emerged from.  Ballroom dancing has stayed the same in this respect until the present possibly because of convenience and tradition.  (In the previous two sentences, I'm just speculating without any hard evidence or credible sources that I could quote for you.)  Is that the way ballroom dancing should be in this present age?  And could it, or even should it, be a metaphor for life?  I've always struggled with woman's place on earth and her relationship to man, probably because I'm not married yet.  Or maybe that's the reason why I'm not married yet.  Whichever it is, my heart is strangely inclined to go both ways towards men, very independent and very submissive...hence the struggle with my place as a woman in the world.  In order to be a part of American society as a single woman, (I am told) I must "lead" and not be led by anyone else because I must prove my worth and following is supposedly a sign f weakness.  In order to be a part of a ballroom dance as a woman, (I am told) I must "follow" and not lead or get ahead of the man that I am dancing with because then I would throw him off which would then throw the whole dance off.
Eventually, since "leading" was not working for me, I tried going back to "following," and strangely, this time it seemed to work.  Everything clicked, at least for a few minutes at a time; the movements flowed (seemingly flawlessly) from man to woman and back again (because there must always be pressure between the two to maintain balance and physical communication).  I was truly following and responding (within ballroom dancing techniques) to the subtle movements that the man was using to lead me.  That was the mind-blowing part...it actually worked.

Stay tuned for when I have more time to finish this long thought...