You know when the Holy Spirit convicts you of something that you did not even realize you were doing? And it is something bad that you think that you should have been able to catch in yourself before He steppped in and pointed it out, because you had never had a problem with that particular sin before...or at least, you did not think you did? Here is the sequence of events I found myself in this week.
A certain friend of mine from school whom I have been trying to show Jesus to, through a series of class schedule related events, needed someone to bring her something to eat for dinner one night this week. She was frantically texting to find someone to do it for her when it occured to me that I could do it. I did not tell her that though, because I could not do it right away. I figured that if no one else was able to bring her dinner, I would do it later when I could. Well, later happened, and I did not call her to find out if someone had brought her some food because I was tired and just wanted to go home. So I went home...and missed an opportunity to be Jesus to someone desperately in need of Him.
The next day, I was in a Bible study about the Good Samaritan, going out of his way to love someone. Right there, God brought up to my mind the events above and events that could happen the next day. In the next day, I was expecting to get an invitation to a get together with my church friends to watch a football game. However, another friend of mine from school had expressed a desire for me to watch the game with her. I was torn between holding out for a yet to be expressed invitation, most likely involving a person that I have a crush on, and hanging out with a great girlfriend from school who has been having an exceptionally rough semester (with school, life, and family) and actually needs the friend time I could give her.
I decided to not make a mistake again by following the guidance my selfish self. I told my friend that I would love to come to her house, and she was ecstatic. The other expected invitation came, from my crush no less, and I tried not to flinch when I told him that I had already made other plans. Besides, I will see everyone in church this weekend soon enough.
The point is not that I need to get over my crush, even though I do because nothing is happening. But all of that is beside the point. The point is that if you pursue your emotional, hormonal, physical, or whatever desires, they will not be fulfilled because they were not made to be fulfilled by a sin tainted world. You must let go of your wants, needs, and desires. But do not just throw them away, because they will still be unfulfilled and stronger than ever. Give them to God because they are His; He made them and knows exactly how to handle them. And when they are out of the way, and the selfish jerk or jerk-ette inside of you does not control your decisions anymore, God can love other people through you who need to feel His love at that moment. This is what I am beginning to learn this week.
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